"You make all things work together for my good."
Oh my. Today was rough. Very rough. I cried most of the day. Okay, for maybe an hour. But that song kept popping into my head. Call it a God-thing, call it me trying to reassure myself. Either way, this song was comforting to me today. I'm listening to it right now.
"When the oceans rage I don't have to be afraid, cause I know that you love me."
You're probably wondering what oceans are raging. Especially now when I'm barely a week away from my planned departure date. Note how I said planned.
Now, nothing is for sure yet, but it looks like I'll be leaving at least a day later. Possibly a week. Why? Because I completely forgot, it totally slipped my mind, to turn in my visa application. Please, don't take it upon yourself to call me an idiot. I've already done that. I thought for sure this was it. There was no way God would allow such a forgetful and unorganized person to go on a trip when she couldn't even be trusted to turn in the most important piece of documentation! And that's what I was crying about. But I've decided to leave that up to God. It seems like He chose me for this trip, so we'll see what happens. No matter what, I have to keep trusting in Him. He does know what He's doing, even when He chose someone like me to keep track of so much important information. He makes ALL things work together for my GOOD.
I've at least learned a valuable lesson.
You may wonder why I still think I'm going to go, and, personally, I think this is the craziest part. Just today I've had one person actually donate and someone else e-mailed me to ask specifically how they can donate to me. I'm taking this to mean God hasn't given up on me. He can use me.
So, prayers are really appreciated today, even more than usual. I made it through today, but now I have to work out what is probably the most important part of my trip. My plane ticket and my visa. And they are tied together, which is the worst part. I have to send in my itinerary in order to get my visa, but it's kind of pointless to buy a plane ticket unless I have my visa. And know you're really wondering how silly I am, I know. I should just buy a later plane ticket, when I at least know my visa will be back, denied or approved. And that is a good idea, one I'll probably end up doing, but that still requires me to BUY a ticket. The way Wycliffe works for interns is they buy everything and then are reimbursed by the money they've raised. And that works out fine - that's how I did my immunizations and how I'm going to pay for my visa, but I don't have the money for the plane ticket. Thankfully, Amy, the intern coordinator is very forgiving. We've talked about this a few times and I keep thinking I have a solution and can pay for it, but alas, now that we are down to the wire I can not. All this to say, please, please pray that either Wycliffe is able to make an exception, or someone gives me the money so I can pay the bill and then donate it to Wycliffe once I've been reimbursed.
I know, it's not likely, but that's why this is a mission's trip and not a tourism trip. I'm not counting on what's likely for us as humans, but on what God can do, which is anything. Can I get an "Amen"? Amen.
Please keep me in your prayers and thoughts. The people who pray for missionaries are honestly the most important part. I read several things about prayer yesterday, one of which my grandmother said. "The purpose of prayer is not to influence God, but to join Him against the enemy, Satan. The real pitch is not God-ward, but Satan-ward. We must be persistent in prayer to block the power of Satan so that God's will works." Now, if there are any theologians out there, you can go nit-pick elsewhere. What Mimi is saying is that when we pray, we build a foundation against Satan. Praying makes things less likely to go all to pieces. I'm not saying things don't go wrong when you pray. I'm saying things go God's way. You can be sure of His plan if you know you've been LISTENING and PRAYING for His guidance. I must admit, in these last few days I have not, and today I really felt it. So, please join with me in prayer.
Lord, I know I've been messing up and not reading Your Word or listening for Your guidance like I should, but thank You that You forgive me, and You are still ready and willing to use me. I wonder at You, sometimes because nothing You do makes since to me at the time, but EVERYTHING comes together for my GOOD. I know this does not mean everything will be good, but that I will only grow better when I trust in You for all things. God, You know all my recent sorrows and stupidity, but You forgive and comfort me, leading me back onto the right path. You show me You are still there when I'm wondering where I lost You. Guide me in these next days as everything gets sorted out, maybe not to my liking or will, but by Your hand and Your guidance. Amen.
Oh my. Today was rough. Very rough. I cried most of the day. Okay, for maybe an hour. But that song kept popping into my head. Call it a God-thing, call it me trying to reassure myself. Either way, this song was comforting to me today. I'm listening to it right now.
"When the oceans rage I don't have to be afraid, cause I know that you love me."
You're probably wondering what oceans are raging. Especially now when I'm barely a week away from my planned departure date. Note how I said planned.
Now, nothing is for sure yet, but it looks like I'll be leaving at least a day later. Possibly a week. Why? Because I completely forgot, it totally slipped my mind, to turn in my visa application. Please, don't take it upon yourself to call me an idiot. I've already done that. I thought for sure this was it. There was no way God would allow such a forgetful and unorganized person to go on a trip when she couldn't even be trusted to turn in the most important piece of documentation! And that's what I was crying about. But I've decided to leave that up to God. It seems like He chose me for this trip, so we'll see what happens. No matter what, I have to keep trusting in Him. He does know what He's doing, even when He chose someone like me to keep track of so much important information. He makes ALL things work together for my GOOD.
I've at least learned a valuable lesson.
You may wonder why I still think I'm going to go, and, personally, I think this is the craziest part. Just today I've had one person actually donate and someone else e-mailed me to ask specifically how they can donate to me. I'm taking this to mean God hasn't given up on me. He can use me.
So, prayers are really appreciated today, even more than usual. I made it through today, but now I have to work out what is probably the most important part of my trip. My plane ticket and my visa. And they are tied together, which is the worst part. I have to send in my itinerary in order to get my visa, but it's kind of pointless to buy a plane ticket unless I have my visa. And know you're really wondering how silly I am, I know. I should just buy a later plane ticket, when I at least know my visa will be back, denied or approved. And that is a good idea, one I'll probably end up doing, but that still requires me to BUY a ticket. The way Wycliffe works for interns is they buy everything and then are reimbursed by the money they've raised. And that works out fine - that's how I did my immunizations and how I'm going to pay for my visa, but I don't have the money for the plane ticket. Thankfully, Amy, the intern coordinator is very forgiving. We've talked about this a few times and I keep thinking I have a solution and can pay for it, but alas, now that we are down to the wire I can not. All this to say, please, please pray that either Wycliffe is able to make an exception, or someone gives me the money so I can pay the bill and then donate it to Wycliffe once I've been reimbursed.
I know, it's not likely, but that's why this is a mission's trip and not a tourism trip. I'm not counting on what's likely for us as humans, but on what God can do, which is anything. Can I get an "Amen"? Amen.
Please keep me in your prayers and thoughts. The people who pray for missionaries are honestly the most important part. I read several things about prayer yesterday, one of which my grandmother said. "The purpose of prayer is not to influence God, but to join Him against the enemy, Satan. The real pitch is not God-ward, but Satan-ward. We must be persistent in prayer to block the power of Satan so that God's will works." Now, if there are any theologians out there, you can go nit-pick elsewhere. What Mimi is saying is that when we pray, we build a foundation against Satan. Praying makes things less likely to go all to pieces. I'm not saying things don't go wrong when you pray. I'm saying things go God's way. You can be sure of His plan if you know you've been LISTENING and PRAYING for His guidance. I must admit, in these last few days I have not, and today I really felt it. So, please join with me in prayer.
Lord, I know I've been messing up and not reading Your Word or listening for Your guidance like I should, but thank You that You forgive me, and You are still ready and willing to use me. I wonder at You, sometimes because nothing You do makes since to me at the time, but EVERYTHING comes together for my GOOD. I know this does not mean everything will be good, but that I will only grow better when I trust in You for all things. God, You know all my recent sorrows and stupidity, but You forgive and comfort me, leading me back onto the right path. You show me You are still there when I'm wondering where I lost You. Guide me in these next days as everything gets sorted out, maybe not to my liking or will, but by Your hand and Your guidance. Amen.
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